Sunday, February 24, 2008

A Dream Within a Deam

"Is all that we see and seem but a dream within a dream?"

I have this phrase stuck in my head. I don't know why. Maybe it's because I feel lost. Forsaken and small, in this world that seems like it wants to run along without me. I'm outside of everything, and in the middle of things that I want to get out of.

The grass is always greener on the other side.

I'm not content. At least not right now. I want something other than what I have. This is normal, I suppose, seeing as everyone is always saying it, but I don't think it's a good thing. I guess it depends upon how you look at it. Always wanting the better thing, striving towards perfection. Some say that such a view will motivate one to achieve something close to their ideal, thus it is good. But cannot all of this inner turmoil also wreak havoc on a person, mentally and physically? Discontent could lead to sleepless nights and sleepness nights, obviously, leave a person tired and unable to perform their best in their day-to-day activities. I guess this depends upon the person. Everyone is different therefore one answer can't satisfy all.

I don't want to feel discontented. But it's part of life...I don't know what I want. That's also part of life, part of being young especially. If I knew what I wanted, maybe then I would be content. Of course, knowing what you want is immensely different from having what you want. But if I knew...then I could make a plan to attain that thing and thus be content that I was actually doing something to make my life better. Because I have this incredibly naive belief that nothing is unattainable if you want it enough. Unless, of course, you want something like a unicorn. Then you probably have problems.